So now it is time for me to break out in to a chorus or two of Happy Birthday to My Princess, Happy Birthday to us.  Today, 1st April 2015, we are one year old and have survived our first twelve months with a few ups and a few downs but, overall, a year which I only take positives from.

Twelve months ago I thought this would be an easy business to operate and my business partner imagined much the same.  A year on and we are both much wiser and realize that, as with any business, to achieve ones goals requires constant hard work, seven days a week and fifty two weeks a year.

We have learnt many lessons and, for me, the hardest one was in managing the girls.  I believe we gave too many second, third and even fourth chances to some of the ladies.  Yes they were pretty little things, quick to smile and always apologetic if they had erred.  However, that was a ruse, nothing more and nothing less.  A chance was given and the offence would be repeated and continued to be repeated until we could not take it any longer and had to let the girl or girls go.

The real shame of things has been the errant way of most girls being caused by the use, or more appropriately misuse, of illegal narcotics.  This is always to be compounded by them having a boyfriend who sits on his ass waiting for them to bring home money so he can get more drugs or more whisky or spend more money gambling or, in many cases, all three.  Then, if he has a few baht in his pocket he does not want his ‘girlfriend’ to go out seeing customers – she has to stay at home with him….until the cash runs out that is.  The fact that some of these so called boyfriends are actually members of the Royal Thai Police force and spend more time selling drugs than they do on the beat hardly makes things better!

Despite coming up with various schemes to encourage the girls to work more diligently it now appears the only way to do things properly is by adopting a zero tolerance policy – a simple one strike and you are out rule.  It may, initially, mean an even higher turnover of girls but eventually the penny will drop.

The only area that I continue to struggle with is timekeeping and I know I am not alone in finding this difficult to deal with.  It does not seem to matter what one says or does, the girls are almost always going to be late and, believe me, this happens all over the world even if in Bangkok it is somewhat more pronounced.  I read an article about ‘Bangkokites’  the other day where it illustrated some of the things one does to show you are a real Bangkok resident.  The item on time keeping was almost perfect – one minute to one hour late = being on time; one to two hours late = fashionable and more than two hours late = cheeky!

The issue of time-keeping though does not relate solely to the girls and several customers are guilty of mismanaging their time.  The most common one is a guy whose plane is due to land at Survarnabhumi airport at, say, 20:00 making a booking to see a girl in his central Bangkok hotel at 21:00.    The earliest possible time he will be in his hotel room is 22:00 and that is subject to not travelling between the hours of eight in the morning and eight at night, it not having rained heavily in the previous twenty-four hours, it not being a public holiday and a taxi driver who actually knows how to reach his destination.  I do explain the likelihood that they will not arrive when they think they will but, in most cases, they know best!

Another misconception the first time visitor has of this city is that it is approximately one hundred square meters thus meaning a girl can be with him in less than a minute because all she has to do is walk no more than one hundred meters.  When you look at the size of Bangkok, note that the majority of girls cannot afford to live in the centre of town or anywhere near it and are aware the traffic is in a constant state of chaos you may then realize why plenty of advance notice needs to be given.

Then we have those who live in a complete fantasy world.  They make a booking and spend weeks or months imbuing their chosen lady with a set of skills she does not possess nor likely ever will.  An entire scenario is constructed on how his time with the lady will be spent and he replays and improves upon his vision every day until they meet.

Many men expect their chosen girl to be as excited as they are about the meeting, some even ask me ‘is Miss X excited about seeing me tomorrow?’  How can I answer that without being cruel?  The girl is doing a job, she sees as many customers as she can and does not even think one iota about the next customer until she is knocking on his hotel room door.  It is not being dismissive of the customer but a simple fact of life – she is not looking to find a life partner or to have the best sex ever known to humankind.  She is looking to be treated respectfully, have sex, get paid and then continue with her life.  We are, after all, an escort agency not a dating site!

If you impose ridiculously high levels of expectancy on people in any role in life you are possibly going to be disappointed 99.99% of the time although, more realistically, you are going to be disappointed 100% of the time.

Just enjoy your time without any preconceived notions.  The girl you book will be the one who arrives at your door.  She will be cute, she will be smiling and she will be playful.  If she is treated well she will respond with affection and if you are kind to her she will remember you fondly.  Perhaps, after several meetings with one girl, you will get to know each other well enough for her to indulge in your fantasies – but this is the point – they are YOUR fantasies, not hers, so do not expect the girl to be totally in to whatever it is that gets your juices flowing.

So, based on a years’ experience, my tips for a successful few hours, a day or a week with a Princess are:

  1. Do not have unreasonable fantasies that you expect the girl to walk directly in to and perform like the lady of your dreams.
  2. Allow plenty of time after arriving in Thailand before meeting your chosen girl.  Do not rush and try to sandwich her in between your arrival and a pre-arranged business meeting.
  3. Relax and do not start shouting down the phone or sending abusive emails if the girl is five, ten or fifteen minutes late – that will only upset you and not make her arrive any sooner.
  4. Do not get the girl very drunk and then complain that she fell asleep – that is what people do when they get drunk!
  5. Always make sure your room telephone works and that you can contact reception.  Possibly as many as 10% of room telephones seem not to work across Bangkok and this makes it rather hard for us and/or the girl to contact you.
  6. Understand that if you wish a girl to meet you at the airport or for bookings of more than one day a deposit of 50% of the booking fee is required in advance.  There is no point debating this with me as it is an unbreakable rule of ours.
  7. If you think our prices are too high then please, with all due respect, go somewhere else to find a lady – we do not do discounts.  There is no point writing to me telling me you think the prices are too high – they work for us and we will not be reducing them because you simply cannot afford our ladies.

For my part I will always advise the girls in advance of any special requests that you have made.  I will continue to endeavor to get the girls to you on time or as close to as on time as possible and ensure that the girls arrive looking presentable knowing that over ninety percent of our customers are staying at five star establishments.

I would also state that when I ask a handful of fairly basic questions relating to a forthcoming booking you answer them all and answer them at the same time.  A high number of customers tell me they want to see a particular lady and want to see her now.  I ask my basic questions, having ascertained the lady is available, and email a reply – usually within a matter of minutes.  I get a reply answering one question.  I reply again asking the outstanding questions yet again and get a reply answering another question but still leaving two, perhaps even three unanswered.  I write again.  We have now taken well over thirty minutes doing something that could have been completed in five minutes or less and this is for someone whose need to see a girl is supposedly urgent.  Eventually, another couple of emails later, I have the information I had asked for an hour previously.  The questions are all relevant; they are all for a reason, they are all very easy and no I am not going to start sending personal information off to anyone save the girl for whom the booking has been made.

I understand several people have had bad experiences in the past with other agencies around the world but we are simply running a business.  We are not scammers nor are we crooks.  We are legitimate business operators doing our very best to run a high class and professional service.  Any information provided to us stays private and is not and never will be released to any third party.

So, a year on and we are still here, still growing, still learning and still excited about our business.  We have seen the opening of our Pattaya Office a few months back and continue to look to expand over the months and years ahead.  We are offering the opportunity for those who are interested to set up a My Princess Franchise in any part of Thailand.  For full details of the franchise offer contact Kevin Mitchell on [email protected] and I will be pleased to discuss the subject with you.

We are now getting a few videos together of the girls and hope to have one or two available for MEMBERS only before end April.

A new menu item, LATEST NEWS, has been added today and here you will be able to check regularly for all updates to the site; new girls that have been added, new pictures of existing girls, dates new blog articles appear and so forth.

This month sees the Songkran Festival, a somewhat love it or hate it few days of water throwing.  The whole of Pattaya and certain areas in Chiang Mai and Bangkok are best avoided during this period for those of you who would rather keep dry.  Whilst I enjoy the festival when I am away in the countryside the craziness that is created in bar areas of Thailand mean that when in Bangkok I tend to stay at home and lock the doors until it is all over and done with.  I am now officially a miserable and rather grumpy old git – a role I believe I was born for.

So I wish you all well, have a pleasant Easter and a fun Songkran and I will be back with more in a couple of weeks.

Cheers for now,